Thursday 10 April 2014

I is for Imaginary Conversations

Off topic I have a new mattress, I'm not sure I like it, it's too squishy!

I think one of the reasons I like blogging is because it lets me voice my inner monologue. I don't have a special someone that I can vent to and even if I don't give away too much of the details just thinking through stressful or emotional situations can really help me sort out how I feel. Another thing that I find helps is having an imaginary conversation.

Let me explain. Lets say for example something has gone wrong at work and your boss has blamed you even though you don't think it's your fault. I'm not very good at stepping back and not letting this get to me but I know that you can't call your boss an idiot and expect to have a job in the morning. So what I will do is say all the things I want to say in a conversation in my head, generally in the car on the way home. You can get all those emotions out without anyone ever hearing you. It also helps when you know a certain conversation is going to happen. You are going for a meeting with a really difficult client who will hop on any mistake and hesitation you make and make you want to cry or smack him in his smug little face or a mixture of both. However if I have already had the conversation in my head then I always feel more prepared. 

Imaginary conversations are not limited to the good. Sometimes I have conversations where I run over what I should have said instead of what I did say. Obviously you can't plan every conversation and interaction in life and when I have reacted badly or stupidly I punish myself with imaginary conversations. I'm not perfect.

I'm pretty sure talking to myself in my head doesn't make me crazy although you might think different!! Today I was told I was probably mildly dyslexic as I often write number sequences the wrong way round, I'm not sure I believe them.


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