Saturday, 31 August 2013

How to Not Get With Randomers

I have got a little behind on my blogging duties, work has taken up most of my day and then combine that with trips to the gym and trying to make the most of the dying days of the summer and blogging has been a little bit sidetracked (I have over 600 blog posts to read so if you get random comments on blog posts that are weeks old, sorry I'm not creeping I'm just a bit late to the game)

One of my besties is going back to uni at the end of next week so we decided to hit Norwich and paint the town red last night so feeling slightly delicate today.

In case you don't know me I'm a bit of a flirt and a bit might be a bit of an understatement, so I think I need some new rules for clubbing to get me out of trouble!

Stop smiling at random strangers - if there are random guys dancing in the middle of an empty dancefloor don't laugh and not expect them to come over and introduce themselves. However if step one fails move onto step two...

Don't engage said random strangers in conversation - they are drunk, you are drunk, it will not end well. They will also entice you into dancing...

Failed at this step too? OK so now you are dancing in the middle of an embarrassingly empty dancefloor after you have just downed a double vodka and lemonade, things are getting a little sketchy. Afore mentioned random guys start to "impress" you with their Inbetweener style dance moves and one mentions that he deserves a hug.

Don't hug random strangers - as you can probably guess failed at this one too!! Which leads to the final stage of getting with randoms, getting with them and they then casually inviting you back to their hotel room.

This happened not once but twice, with bloody friends. What is wrong with me?!?

Monday, 26 August 2013

Things I Have Learnt This Bank Holiday Weekend

Wasp stings bloody hurt - I know that the general consensus of how to deal with wasps is to stay calm and they will leave you alone, well that would be fine if people around me weren't losing their minds about a striped flying thing that's like 5cm long. Dad hit it with a fly squat in mid flight, it flew under the table and stung the first fleshy thing it could find which happened to be my knee. To say I swore was an understatement and it still really hurts and has gone all red, hot and blotchy... attractive

Working out without eating before hand is bad news - Today was my third day at the gym and because I am not a morning person I didn't eat before I went. Cue me feeling super sick and had really bad cramps in my legs for the whole time on the cross trainer - never again! I also worked out on the rowing machine next to Anthony Ogogo, who if you didn't know is an Olympic Medal winning boxer!! I have no idea how he can row soo fast, it was ridiculous. I then tweeted to this effect and he only bloody retweeted it!! So there I was squealing because an Olympian retweeted me while I ate Belgian waffles!!

Shaping your own eyebrows is relatively easy - Because of my newly lightened hair my eyebrows have become a very strong feature on my face, too strong I think so I decided it was time to get rid of the bushy caterpillars! So I followed this tutorial which was a really helpful way to not overdo the plucking as I don't want them too thin as that would look even more stupid!!

I am jealous of Jenifer Aniston's body - Went to watch "We're the Millers" today with my sister and it was bloody hilarious. She had to cover my mouth at one point as I was laughing too loud, I'm embarrassing like that!! But when I saw Jenifer Aniston's body it was like bloody hell!! I wish I had that body now, let alone when I'm her age, goal in mind!

My name is more of a pain than I ever thought possible - So my mum's friend is an absolute diamond and waited in line and brought me and all my siblings Coca Cola bottles with our names on the labels. However she had to prove that I was a person as it's a brand name so she had to look me up on Facebook to prove that she wasn't trying to advertise another company!!

Beauty Review - Rimmel Wake Me Up Concealer

So I am writing this post on a bank holiday Monday before going to the gym, what have I become? I never thought those words would come out of my mouth but here I am and I feel good about it. So what I've only lost a pound this week? I'm not bitter about it at all (OK maybe I am a bit but when I think realistically I know that I didn't really expect much more!!)

One side effect of the gym is that I am bloody knackered and a side effect of this is the massive black circles under my eyes, so to hide the fact that I am finding this hard concealer is required. 

I brought the Rimmel Wake Me Up Concealer in Ivory earlier this week from Tesco (£5.50). My trusty Bourjouis concealer had been running out for a while and I haven't had a chance to go somewhere like Boots to buy some more so supermarkets are my only beauty hope at the moment!!

The colour is very good for my skin tone and I find it easily blendable. It has good coverage for about 5-6 hours however I do find the consistency quite gloopy to start off with when you first apply to the skin. I just dab a little on my blemishes and then a gentle smear under each eye and then blend with my fingers. I would recommend this product if you are looking for something quite inexpensive that does the job 

Sunday, 25 August 2013

Confessions of a Shopaholic Tag

I was tagged in the "Confessions of a Shopaholic" tag by the wonderful Hannah Lucy over at the Hannah Lucy Diaries so I thought I would join in and let you into all the saucy details about my shopping habits!

1. Would you consider yourself a shopaholic? Unfortunately yes! I have so many clothes that it could be considered ridiculous by some. I love shopping, I love having new things, they don't have to be expensive but I just love having stuff!

2. How would you classify your style? I would classify my style as inappropriate!! Nah just kidding but if the weather is hot I'll be wearing a jumper, if it's cold a dress, too casual, too dressed up, yeah I'm that girl! I have a lot of dresses and lot of skirts, I love printed trousers and see through blouses, just a mix of whatever makes me feel happy

3. What store can you not leave without buying at least one thing? Either New Look or River Island. If I have an outfit on and doesn't include something from one of these shops I'm doing well

4. Where do you find the best deals? I do a lot of online shopping and find I get my best deals on ASOS but I really hate sale shopping so it won't be in the sales

5. Do you have a "go to" shopping outfit? Linking back to my inappropriate confession, it will be anything that's really difficult to get out of with a million layers. I went shopping earlier this month and wore a tiny halterneck dress that was so difficult to get in and out of

6.What is your guilty pleasure? (not including beauty products) My guilty pleasure is probably black high heels. Most people would look at them and say they are all the same but they all look beautiful and I'm constantly buying more!!

7. What is one staple clothing piece you can't live without? It would either be leggings or black cardigans both of which I have lots of

 8. What is a trend you hope never goes out of style? I hope that midi skirts never go out of fashion. I brought my first one a couple of months ago and now I have 4 (two of them are exactly the same but just different colours, I'm obsessed!!)

9. What trend did you love that passed away too quickly? I loved printed wide leg trousers but I now can't seem to find them anywhere, I have to ration wearing the pair that I have as I don't want to break them

10. Who is your fashion icon? I don't really have a fashion icon to be honest, most women in the media are too skinny for me to be able to pull off their style and I like to wear what I'm comfortable in. That doesn't mean that I don't love over women's styles or that I do anything different from the normal everyday person!!

Saturday, 24 August 2013

Ginger at the Gym

You might have noticed something new about me in this picture (although I have noticed that I always have the same facial expression in every picture!!), it might be the fact that instead of red hair I now have a weird combination of orangey yellow hair with dark brown roots. I would try to convince you that this was intentional but I would be lying to you!!

I stripped my hair as I want to ombre it and it's really hard to dye red hair. This is meant to be my natural hair colour. I'm 99% sure I don't remember this ever being my hair colour but you never know!! I just stood in the shower and laughed because if not I probably would have cried!

However everyone has been really complimentary about it and says that it suits me more than red hair, so I don't know what to do now!! Either they are being nice, they have really bad taste in hair or it's not as bad as I think it is. My sister absolutely hates it but I'm not sure. I have to wait for 2 weeks to dye it again so I will see if I get used to it and I might even keep it!! I think it's my dark eyebrows that I find the most difficult to get used to.

This picture isn't the most flattering as I had just got back from my first ever gym session. My stomach muscles are killing me and the cross trainer is not my friend (boobs and an up and down motion = not good!!) But I'm really enjoying it and I never thought I would. I have already been this morning and just feel like I have accomplished something

What's your verdict on the hair colour? What do you enjoy most about exercising?

Wednesday, 21 August 2013

See Through Shirts & Snooker

In case you haven't noticed I love a bit of alliteration, I think it's my high school English coming out to play! I meant to write this post last night but by the time I got home it was already pretty late and I was too sleepy.

It's crazy how quickly time flies, last time I saw some of the friends I saw last night was when I was in high school. It makes me feel old, super duper old!! It also doesn't help going out and seeing a group of girls that look about twelve, they were actually sixteen. I miss that time of taking a million pictures of everything that happens in your life, of wearing too much eye makeup, of singing and dancing to Demi Lovato (well it was probably Avril Lavigne when I was that age). I don't miss the fact that I felt like I constantly had to impress people, that I was always the chubby girl, that I had to dress up for every occasion. Last night I wore a blouse that was much more see through than I actually thought, didn't even notice!

On another point I am rubbish at pool, didn't realise that you actually have to look where you want the ball to go and the ball you want to hit. I am no good at angles either!!

Sunday, 18 August 2013

Exercising Tips from a Fatty

This little chubba is how I feel at the moment and I seriously need to do something about it. It's exactly one month until I wear a swimsuit in Cyprus sun and I'm a little bit worried that someone is going to attempt to harpoon the whale. So I have one exercising tip that I have learnt so far:

Exercise in something that makes you feel hideous

Make sure you can see your thighs wobble, your stomach rolls. Make sure you know that your back fat is wobbling and make sure that the horrible bit that is just above your boobs is visible because then you have a constant reminder as to why you are doing this to yourself. I am not an exercising fan and because I'm carrying that extra weight I find it hard so tonight looking like crap really made me keep going.

Just a reminder that I am offering FREE Guest Post spots in September. You don't have to be a blogger, you can be a friend or follower who just wants to pop in and have a little chat. Email me ( or leave a comment!!

Giveaway + Guest Post

Sorry I have been a little quiet this weekend, brought a new bed and basically spent most of this weekend proving that I'm rubbish at DIY

I know I'm a little late wishing the beautiful Autumn @ The Unreal Life a Happy Birthday but my laptop had been put up and I don't know how to copy and past on my Ipad and the blogger app is rubbish. And to celebrate her birthday she is hosting a really great giveaway with some really great bloggers!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

The Unreal Life / 1 month "Kinda Jank" ad space
Hang on Honey / 2 months "Glass of Merlot" ad space
Cotton and Boots / Essie Nailpolishes
Simple Chronicles of Me / $10 Sephora gift card
The Skinny Student / $10 Barnes and Noble gift card
Petite Ramblings / $15 Sephora gift card

Also I am going on holiday to Cyprus in exactly one month and while I'm gone I'd like some of my lovely readers to host some guest spots for me. The theme will be "A place you love to be" and could be about your hometown, a place you've been on holiday, a day out, anything really! I need posts by the 2nd September and if you want join in either leave me a comment or send me an email ( I also need someone to be able to tell me how to schedule the posts for when I am away

Thursday, 15 August 2013

5 Reasons I'm Single

1. I'm too honest (hence this post and maybe this whole blog)

2. I'm 99% sure I'm crazy. Talking to a colleague today about how I felt really happy but also on the verge of tears, he proceeded to tell me I was probably bi polar. I told him I would do a Britney because I'm sure I could pull that look off

3. I'm way too sarcastic. Having a heartfelt moment? Well let me ruin that with a big ole dose of sarcasm.

4. I swear like a sailor, actually I probably would make a sailor blush. I cried at my boss last week and then apologised for how many swear words I said in that crazy moment (this and the reason that I am always late is probably why I'm also a bad employee)

5. I love to exaggerate (as you can probably tell from the afore mentioned reasons!!)

And now I know why and so does everyone else, I'm considering proper online dating. I know I said never again in this post here but it's so hard to meet people! What do you think? 

Tuesday, 13 August 2013

What do you do #3

when you feel really lonely?

Ignore it and feel like crap

Unfortunately for this one I really don't have the answer. Feelings of loneliness are the most common thing that gets me down and I don't help myself because when I feel down I hide away. Things have been going on recently that have made me feel extra lonely. It is now nearly longer that I have been apart from my ex boyfriend than we were together and that makes me sad. Time is moving too quickly and at times I feel like my life is passing me by without any achievements. 

I feel like, through no fault of my own, I have lost two people that I considered close friends. Not to say that we aren't friends but at this stage I don't feel like I can trust them with my feelings (if you are one of my friends and you think this is you, it probably isn't, most of you know the story but I'm still too emotional at the moment to go into it in full detail on my little blog)

Hopefully things will get better soon and it's just a lull, in the mean time I'm trying to make myself happy, share moments with friends and family and try not to eat too much food!

If you like this post (not the sad content but the style) then check out my other "What do you do" posts here and here

Sunday, 11 August 2013

Introducing the Self Absorbed Fatty

I'm a twenty something girl who lives in the UK and I have lived in the same house ever since I was born (yes I still live with my parents, everything is too expensive and I don't earn enough money to move out yet). I am the oldest of six children and my name is actually Toyota. I am 99% sure I have heard every joke under the sun about my name but points to you if you can think of something original.

My job sounds really boring so I'm not going to explain it to you but I have wanted to be a million things under the sun. It started off as a cooker (no one explained to me that it was actually a chef) and moved onto air hostess, teacher, nurse and architect. I'm still not sure what I am doing is what I want to do for the rest of my life but it's a start. The only other job I have had is a waitress and I was pretty awful, mainly because I am very clumsy.

My favourite childhood movie was Dumbo and my mum recorded it off the tv so that I could watch it whenever I wanted it. I now have it on DVD so Disney company please don't be angry with us!!

I used to only eat spaghetti carbonara and I would have this like 5 times a week. And it wouldn't be a proper carbonara with cream and eggs etc but a crappy packet mix!! The bad news is I still eat this when I'm feeling nostalgic.

I HATE BLUEBERRIES!! Like actually hate them, maybe even a phobia of them, they remind me of eyeballs, which then reminds me of Middle School Science lessons where we dissected an eye and I passed out at the first crunch. I am also well known for saying I don't like something when I have never tried it although I'm getting much better at it.

I used to play the clarinet although I was rubbish. It took me 5 years to get to Grade 3. I don't think it helped that I used to be too shy to ask my teacher if I could go to the lessons (I am not even shy at all anymore, I have no idea how this happened) I also used to ballet dance for 13 years. I even got onto point shows which was the most difficult thing I have ever done in my life. I have done a lot of dance shows and maybe if you ask super sweetly I will show you some pictures (I am often dressed as a man but with the brightest show makeup you could imagine, I am attractive)

So this is just a little taster of me, if there is anything you want to know then just ask!!

Saturday, 10 August 2013

Beauty Review - Aussie 3 Minute Miracle Hair Conditioner

What do you do when your hair looks like utter crap and feels like straw? Complain about it and put it up all the time? Umm no? Just me? My hair has taken a lot of punishment with it being coloured, blow dried, straightened, brushed, plaited, pinned, hair sprayed and after all that my hair hasn't really been looking it's best. Anyways after all that I decided to purchase some Aussie 3 Minute Miracle Conditioner and it has been really good on my hair!! I now use this at least once a week (and more if my hair feels horrible). Still hate the colour though and I'm hoping to do something a bit different with it soon, keep your eyes peeled.

Friday, 9 August 2013

Beauty Review - Revlon Just Bitten Kissable Balm Stain

You were going to end up with a horrible picture of me wearing this lip balm but by the time I had edited out the bags under my eyes and the blemishes on my skin after a long week you couldn't even see the colour of the lip balm. The effect is also very subtle so it's difficult to photograph.

I love a lip stick but sometimes lip stick is just too much. Sometimes you want something low maintenance that just glides on and doesn't dry out your lips. Welcome this little product here. Yesterday at work I needed the full dramatic look of a red lipstick, I needed to feel good about myself and sadly that is what lipstick does for me. Today was a less in your face look and I really liked it. 

It feels great to apply, like drawing on yourself with a giant crayon and is really moisturising. The only down point for me is the smell. I think it's meant to be minty but it just smells and therefore tastes a bit medicinal. This was a present from my sister and she knows me too well.

Have you tried any of these? What do you think?

Thursday, 8 August 2013

Sharing the Blog Love

So this month I'm really trying to grow this little blog of mine (not sure it's working for me, I still only have 16 followers) and I've jumped into the world of sponsorship and guest post.

Firstly I did my first guest post for Kayli @ Kayli Wanders (which you can find here) As soon as she offered free guest spots I was there but not just because I wanted to get more readers but because I love her blog. She is such an adventurer (and too pretty, life isn't fair!) and I love reading about her life. She is a fairly new blogger but her blog is so put together it's crazy!!

I'm sponsoring Autumn @ The Unreal Life. She literally makes me laugh out loud at the stuff she writes and I sit in my little bedroom nodding along to pretty much every post she makes because it totally resonates with my life (apart from the fact she is way cooler than I am)

I'm also sponsoring Amanda @ Living in Another Language who incredibly lives in South Korea and just makes my desire to go travelling to Asia all the more prevalent (and the way life is going at the moment a break is what I need). 

So I kind of just wanted to say thanks girls for having such amazing blogs!! 

Tuesday, 6 August 2013

Living in a Soap Opera

My life feels like a plot in Eastenders at the moment and most of you probably wouldn't believe me even if I did tell you what was going. Also it's really not my story to tell especially not on the internet but let's just say my head is all over the place at the moment. So while I wish things were a little less dramatic, I'm going to tell you 3 shows I wish my life was like:

1) Heroes - I loved this show so much it was unbelievable. I want the box set of all seasons but I don't have that kind of dollar! The main reason I want my life to be like this is because I want to be Hayden Panettiere, not just like her, I want to be her and she has super powers to top it all off.

2) Downton Abbey - I want it to be acceptable to be that dressed up every day, I want to wear dresses to my ankles and wear hats and no one bat an eyelid. I want someone to pick out my clothes for me and then help me wear a crazy amount of undergarments. I want to be posh

3) CSI - I really wanted to be a Crime Scene investigator because of this show but then I actually researched it as a job and a) realised that this job doesn't really exist in the UK and b) it's not real! Dammit, career choice over. Ok so I don't really want criminals targeting me in their everyday criminal endeavors, I don't want to be killed like Warwick or kidnapped like Nick or trapped under a car like Sarah but I want to capture bad people - this also applies to my need to be Batman

I'm pretty sure I'm going crazy!!

Sunday, 4 August 2013

Junk in the Trunk

Feeling extra fat today. Reasons for this include:

  1. Got my chunky booty stuck in a rubber ring  for about 5 minutes, I laughed but slowly I was dying inside. (well technically you are always slowly dying, it's called the progression of time moron!! I ain't no Benjamin Button)
  2. My new top from Miss Selfridge makes me look more pregnant than my 32 week pregnant friend
  3. Wearing a bikini - no other explanation needed
  4. Shopping and trying on an ever so unflattering dress, in which I can see myself from every angle. No one wants to see themselves from every angle, how much fat can one pair of retinas take?!?!
  5. Standing next to my very skinny 13 year old sister in above mentioned bikini, urge to drown her was nearly unbearable
To combat this I need cake and maybe chocolate and possibly cider - definitely not to go on a diet. No way am I going to be skinny in 7 weeks before I go on holiday, let's just hope no one tries to harpoon the whale in the ocean!!

Saturday, 3 August 2013

Crafty Beggar - Ipad Case

After my extravagant purchase of an Ipad the other day, me and my sister decided that it wouldn't be complete without making my own personalised Ipad case. So without further ado check out this bad boy:

If you would like to make this or something similar let I will let you into how I made this.

You will need:
  • Plain Ipad case - I got one from Curry's that was clear plastic for £4.99
  • PVA Glue
  • Glitter - Any colour although I picked white
  • Beads - We picked up a massive bag of assorted beads for £5 for Hobbycraft
  • Hard Plastic Super Glue
First cover the case in PVA glue and go glitter crazy. In my opinion there is no such thing as too much glitter (although this opinion is probably only shared by 6 year old girls and drag queens)

After the PVA has glued slightly (approx 20 mins) you can go to town with as many beads as you wish. You can either plan them out in a pattern first and then glue them after this or you can go like me and my sister and just go crazy. If you look at the picture you can probably tell that the 2 halves look slightly different. The top half my sister stuck the beads on, very linear, you can tell there has been a thought process - bottom half me - oh look a pretty bead, oh look another pretty bead.

Now I can't usually manage kooky but this is pretty out there for me, what do you think?

Friday, 2 August 2013

Wet Tshirt Friday

You know your life has hit rock bottom when you tell your boss in front of a room of your colleagues that "You are really happy when you are wet"

Another case of engage mouth before engaging brain, cue me getting very flustered and wandering off muttering "well you know what I mean"

Let's give you the back story.

My boss, professional man in his mid thirties with 3 children, decided that it would be a really funny idea to prick in a pin in my water bottle while I was at lunch. He did it to my friend who noticed straight away, they laughed about it and I don't know why I didn't click that he would have done the same thing to me!!
Now to start off with the hole wasn't big enough to cause me any problems, the bottle was making a weird noise but I ignored it. It wasn't until I filled it up and while I was carrying it up the stairs with 4 other people's water bottles that I realised I was getting very damp! Now I thought that I had put the lid on not quite properly or something and then I clicked. I tried drinking from it and completely covered my desk and to say I was a little bit grumpy was an understatement at that time. I chucked the whole bottle in the bin completely filled with water and had a hissy fit.

Boss: "I was just trying to have some fun and make people happy"
Me: "Yeah because I'm really happy when I'm wet"

Dammit!! Why can I not think before I speak??

Let me know some of the times you wish you have wished that you could take back the words that just came from your mouth so that I don't feel quite so alone in my embarrassment. I quickly left after that comment, I'm so glad it's the weekend! 

Thursday, 1 August 2013

The Day the Bank Manager Won't Forget

So I took the day off work today as yesterday was my sister's birthday. I decided we would do some shopping and eat some lunch, what I didn't decide on was spending quite so much money today!! But oh well I work hard for my dollar and if I'm not going to spend it on myself then who will!! 

Bikini Top - £24 Bikini Bottom - £14

First purchase - this orange bikini from Boux Avenue. The top comes in proper bra sizes which is a must for women with a slightly larger bust size. I was a bit concerned that the briefs were - well a bit too brief but after trying them on I was pleasantly surprised. These will go in my - For Cyprus pile

Top - £22

I am a sucker for anything see through so I just had to try on this top. I thought it would go nicely with my new bikini as a beach cover up but also I can wear a strap top underneath and wear with leggings, jeans etc etc

2 for £25

Now this pinafore dress is not as tiny as it looks hanging up, it is in regular chunka size. I love everything in River Island, it is one of my favourite shops, but for a long time I had convinced myself that the clothes were too small and too expensive without ever actually having set foot in the shop!! These two purchases are more of an autumn purchase but I liked them so much I has to buy them.

BUT MY BIGGEST PURCHASE WAS AN IPAD!! This bad boy cost me nearly as much as my car and I am so excited. I absolutely love it!! So today I have been well and truly spoilt by me.

P.S Me and my sister totally have done something kooky with my new case which I will post about this weekend